Author Archives: Amy Beilharz

Springing into Life for Success

Are you springing into life?

The past month I have been surrounded by millions of wildflowers on my land and the surrounding country roads — the air is actually perfumed with the gentle aroma of all these flowers. With gentle temperatures outside, I have been able to work with my windows wide open, inspired by breezes and songbirds.

Each spring, life puts forth such a magnificent show of new energy that it viscerally changes how I feel. Does it affect you that way, too?

I am happier, more motivated and inspired to create things myself.

I have also noticed that people have this same effect on each other.

When I am around someone who is on fire with life, creating with gusto some new venture, it inspires me to become more active on my own goals.

Are you working on a BIG goal?

If not, consider surrounding yourself with people who help you move from your own internal winter to “springing into life!” And if you are on fire with inspiration for what you are doing — THANK YOU! You are, perhaps unknowingly, infusing others with a spring-like energy that is worth more than you realize, I welcome you to share it with us.

Rewriting History

I remember learning in college that some of the “facts” I learned as a child about American history were not always accurate (or at least not the whole story). It was disconcerting at the time, although I have learned since then that most of the things we call facts are really opinions. It’s why many governments choose jury trials–to allow multiple perspectives to weigh in.

The Emmy Award winning journalist, Cokie Roberts, has written two books to bring women to the forefront of the history of our nation–Founding Mothers: The Women Who Raised our Nation, and her most recent Capital Dames: The Civil War and the Women of Washington. I am inspired by Cokie’s dedication to help us remember the courage and significant contributions women have displayed to shape the world we know today.

You might also look at your own life.  Have you been playing a supporting role that does not get much of the limelight or recognition? Perhaps, it is time to rewrite your own history–not for others but for yourself. Make sure you recognize your own contributions, even if you do not want the fan fare from others.

The Benefits of Hiring Qualified People for your Business

Does tax time leave you stressed and frantic?

Last week I was finishing my business taxes and this week I am completing my personal tax filing.  How is your tax preparation coming?

For years, this event has always weighed heavily on me.  As a perfectionist, I was always double checking accuracy; as an entrepreneur, I was just antagonized by the bureaucracy of it all.

Sometimes hiring a qualified person to do the work, becoming a little more familiar with the work needed, and asking lots of questions is your best path to success.

Unless you are a Certified Public Accountant you probably are not current on tax codes, estate laws, accelerated business depreciation options and other items that can affect your tax filing.  I am not an expert on these things either, and I prefer to keep it that way.  So I hire someone to do this for me—freeing my time to create incoming revenue, rather than worrying about how it is counted.

Many entrepreneurs fail this success test; they try to do too much and hold too much of the information close to their chest.  High stress at tax time is an indication this might be true of you.  Taxes, bookkeeping, payroll processing, website maintenance, or any other administrative job that is not directly tied to the success of your company is subject to this litmus test—no matter how small your company is.

My business taxes will cost me around $6,000 to have prepared this year and save me weeks, maybe more, of time I would otherwise have to spend doing data entry, understanding the current tax code, and finding the correct tax forms for each of my three businesses.  Investing two weeks finishing my Wealth Development Program and running my three businesses will earn me more than $6,000 AND I will be helping women like you earn WAY more than $6,000, too!

Is it a good use of my money to invest in my CPA entering all my business checks and credit card entries, reconciling them, preparing financial statements and then preparing my various tax filings for three businesses?

Absolutely, yes!

If you haven’t hired someone to do keep your financial books in order because you are too small I recommend you find a company that does virtual bookkeeping.   Their rates can be well below what you expect, and when tax time comes you will be reviewing reports, not creating them. My tax seasons have become much less stressful since I gave up doing this activity in the wee hours of the night and weekends.

Whether for taxes or another administrative tasks my decision process looks like this:

  1. I look at each area and ask, “Does this affect the heart of my business?”  If not, I hire out someone to help me if it is essential to get done (Things like payroll, taxes cannot be left undone or put off until later.)
  2. I look for quality people or firms to hire—they must be people I feel confident can get the job done well.  I always require referrals and I talk to them.  (It costs me even more time to fix something someone has done wrong than to do it myself, so finding the right person or firm is key.)
  3. Do they stand behind their work? (For example, I only hire payroll processing companies that will pay the penalties if they do something wrong with my payroll taxes because accuracy on someone’s pay is essential and IRS penalties can be steep.)
  4. I ask questions and get involved in the work so that I understand it—I don’t accept their work or recommendations carte blanche as absolutely right.  I have hired this person or firm to a specific task, but just like when I have an employee do work—it is still up to me to ensure it is right and accurately represents my company.  When this is in an area I do not have much knowledge, I ask lots of questions and make sure that what they have provided me makes sense based on what I know about how my company operates.  With financials if the resulting financial statements are different than I expect, one of two things has happened.  Either, I did not understand some piece of my operations or there is an error in how the documents were prepared perhaps based on a wrong assumption made by someone who doesn’t know my business like I do.
  5. I get out of the way and let them do the work they do best, so I can do mine.

The key is to employ others and recognize you do not need to be an expert at everything.  Then during tax time and other hurdles you can still be smiling and working on what you love.

I encourage you to review the list above and see what you can hand off to others in order to have more time for yourself and your business.

working through overwhelm

Success Comes at the Pace of One Step at a Time

When you find yourself in extremely difficult situations, take it one step at a time. I love the image Joe De Sena gives of running — just to the next telephone pole, not the total distance.

“The way to get through anything mentally painful is to take it a little at a time. The mind can’t handle dealing with a massive iceberg of pain in front of it, but it can deal with short nuggets that will come to an end. So instead of thinking, Ugh, I’ve got twenty-four miles to go, focus on making it to the next telephone pole in the distance…the ability to compartmentalize pain into these small bite sizes is key.” ~ Joe De Sena from Spartan Up!

When coaching grief groups, I’m often surrounded by people whose lives have just been shaken to the core — the loss of a lifelong partner, the death of a parent, or even a child. At these times, it feels like the very foundation has dropped out, and they are navigating the world with no floors or ground. I cannot take away their pain, I can only help them navigate the waters until the waves become less violent. At those times, one of the best remedies is to not try to visualize life in total — which feels hopeless and overwhelming — but to visualize getting through the current day, or even hour.

Whatever in your life is stopping you in your tracks — even if it is just today’s work — can be compartmentalized to it’s smaller components and tackled one at a time.

If you find yourself not taking action because the task feels too big, or the result too risky — try this technique. Because moving forward, even one small step, will help you improve your outlook and your results.

Want to change the game? Change the model.

“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.”  ~Buckminster Fuller

I love this quote because it reminds me to avoid the way I used to approach injustices—as if I could convince, demand or cajole the “truth” of my perspective.  Whether with my children, my partners, or at my work–the raw fact is other people have different “truths.” On top of that, it seems the more I fought, the less I got.  Maybe you’ve had some of these experiences, too?

  • Asking the kids to do the dishes…again
  • Fighting with a spouse about them always assuming you’re available to watch the children when they make plans
  • Feeling passed over for a promotion that you felt was yours

Sometimes, these situations feel futile and draining.  You might ask how can you build a new model for things like doing dishes?  It is possible, but you have to step back from the problem and look at it from a wider view.  Here is an example:

One year, I took the kids to a paint-your-own-ceramic outing. Each of us painted our own plate, bowl and cup.  We had a blast.  The kids were enthralled at the idea of having their own personally painted dishes.  When the day came to bring the beautiful glazed dinnerware home, we moved our regular dishes to an inconvenient location and put our masterpieces in their place.

After meals when it finally came time to do dishes, they were now forced to see that their dish was dirty and understand theirs had to be cleaned before they could eat again.  I no longer had to beg, plead, or threaten for anyone to do their dishes!  I no longer had to referee arguments over who’s turn it was or who’s mess it was.  I changed the model and the problems I was seeing under the old model evaporated.

The same is true for opportunities women have (or don’t have) in business, politics or any other field.  Statistics are shockingly low for women in positions of power and even lower for funding women entrepreneurs verses their male counterparts.

Should we fight this injustice?

I suggest we take Buckminster Fuller’s advice and change the model.  As important as it will be to change unconscious and conscious cultural biases, it is equally or more important for women with resources to start helping other women. This could be resources of time, money or position.

When Ella Fitzgerald could not get into a big Hollywood club early in her career, Marilyn Monroe told the club she would attend every show and bring the press.  The club agreed, and Ella Fitzgerald became one of the best knows female singers in the world. Marilyn used her position in the entertainment world and her time to help another woman.

According to Business Insider, women over 50 control $15 trillion in capital. When these women start to become angel investors supporting women entrepreneurs, it will completely change the game of early stage investment.

You may not have vast amounts of money or even time.  But that does not mean you cannot make a difference and help change the existing model of business, politics, education or any other field you are passionate about.  Think about it like this:

  • 85% of purchases in the U.S. are made by women
  • Women make 80% of healthcare decisions
  • 40% of all American private businesses are owned by women

Yet, 91% of women say they do not think advertisers understand them.  50% of products marketed to men are typically bought by women.

You vote at the polls, with your credit cards and cash, and even where you send your children to school.  Start to investigate the possibilities of where you can put your money, voice and time behind a woman.  Because if 50% of the population started to move our support to other women–rather than waiting for men to, the existing model will become obsolete.

change your negative thoughts

With the Right Mentality, Your Obstacles Will Give Way

Recently, I have been plagued with a number of set backs in a project of mine. The setbacks were tied to government agencies, so the solutions were slow and laborious. It has been hard to not focus on the problems. These are the moments when affirmations and pretending things are OK fail most of us, and they were failing me. All I could see was the obstacle.

So I used an exercise to help me focus on the outcome I want (and not feel like I am just lying to myself).

First, I wrote down everything that was going wrong. I included my judgment about the people involved, the unjustness of the situation, and how it makes me feel. Then, I noticed some repetitive patterns in my outlook similar to other situations, so I kept writing — things like how it seems I often make great efforts and then something “always” happens to get me off track — or how things are so hard. I wrote until I had completely exhausted all the ways this situation and similar ones frustrate me.

You know you’re on to something important when what you write makes you think, “Yep, that is exactly how it is.”

It could be how you have been trying to improve your relationship for some time, but your partner is unwilling to put the effort into changing. Or maybe it is that you do a great job at work and your boss dismisses your efforts and praises other people who didn’t work near as hard as you.

After I felt complete with this part, I began writing what it would look and feel like if I was experiencing the exact opposite of this situation.

Because what I wrote was the polar opposite of what I had been experiencing it was really powerful. I could actually FEEL what it would feel like to have it be like I wanted. The difference is that it wasn’t a band-aid affirmation — it was the EXACT OPPOSITE of what I had written –line by line.

Because I was already emotionally involved in my view of what was wrong, it was equally easy to pin point the exact things that would feel right. I think that is the key to exercises like this. You need to use them in the moment, not just as a theoretical exercise.

Now, I am ready each morning and rewriting each night (focusing on the things I wrote about what I do want to experience). And it’s working!

I will leave you with a quote from Napoleon, who was known for being single-minded in his thinking.

I see only the objective; the obstacles must give way!

You might want to try this exercise, too, join me in overcoming negative thought patterns! And, please let me know how it goes.

change your mind to change your life

Are You Planning for the Worst?

I have spent years avoiding what I do not want. Avoiding the bad. Do you know that feeling?

I scan my environment continually. I notice other people’s moods, find ways to improve them, review business results, quickly change any headed the wrong way, assess my calendar and adjust to ensure there are no conflicts with important people and events. I am good at anticipating other people’s needs or problems before they articulate them, short circuiting problems before they arise with my family, employees, and friends.

In some ways, it looks like I am extremely effective because of this knack at having a keen radar for my world and its direction. If you have this tendency to be exo-centric (a new word I made up in contrast to eco-centric) then you understand what I mean. Don’t get me wrong, my basic ability to be empathetic and inspire people around me is great (as is my ability to turn around businesses and keep a packed calendar that still works). This gets me a lot of kuddos in the world.

But it is exhausting AND keeps me focused on what can go wrong! The underlying motivating force has my world on tilt and not near as fun as it could be.

What I am noticing is the energy behind this “strength” of mine is a fear that something is about to go wrong and that I need to ensure it doesn’t.

Ouch! That is not the mental attitude I want to live my life from. And with all the positive reinforcement I get from family, friends and co-workers for keeping life smooth for them and me, no wonder it took me so long to notice this.

I think I have spent most of my life avoiding “catastrophe.” I don’t think it would be useful to just affirm I am not going to do it anymore starting today, but I do want to change it.

So my plan is to actively notice what is going well. It may not immediately stop these other thoughts, but over time with practice I will be training my mind to build on the good instead of avoid the bad.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this? Are you an avoid-er of problems? What will you do to move your radar detection mechanism away from this tendency?

the secret to achieving your goals

Are you focused?

What would it take to actually achieve those goals you set at the beginning of the year?

Are you focused; or are you plagued with guilt over still carrying those extra pounds or not maintaining the original vigor you had to accomplish a specific career or relationship goal?

In a previous blog, I talked about how our subconscious mind has a set point, that brings us back to a pre-programmed belief about ourselves (whether it is in our weight, work or our relationships).

For most of us, those unconscious beliefs keep us stuck where we don’t want to be instead of heading where we’ve stated we want to go.

But there are ways to use this same mechanism to get what we do want, too.

The four steps for moving from a negative set point to a positive one are:

  1. Move your attention from what you do not want to what you do.
  2. Start to see yourself as having what you do want.
  3. Expect the good you want; not the bad you do not.
  4. Look for what is already good and be grateful for it.

I remember a friend telling a story about his first motorcycle ride in the Colorado mountains. Although an experienced rider, he said he was overly nervous and driving slower than the friend he was riding with. Finally, his friend pulled off the road at a overlook to talk. When they had both pulled over his friend looked him in the eye and said, “You will go off the edge if you keep looking at it. You have to look at where you want to go. It is the only way to drive these mountains safely.”

It is the same lesson in life as on that mountain road — if you keep looking where you don’t want to go, that is where you will end up. I notice it in every aspect of my life.

I remember hearing about this same concept in parenting classes years ago. My kids would promise to help with dishes or do some chore. I would notice that they didn’t do it. We would fight. They would do it reluctantly and then the cycle would start all over again. But when I would follow the recommendations to notice and thank them when they did do what I wanted, rather than focus on when they did not, I truly got more and more of what I wanted.

So whatever the goal — no matter how guilty you feel that you haven’t yet achieved it — start training your mind to look at the goal, not your current lack of it.

It really is simply a habit, the way we look at things. Like any habit, they become habits through repetition. So to change it we need to repeatedly change our view. I have been doing this for a year and by repeatedly moving my attention to my goal, and off my current results, I have noticed I am changing my set point. My rebound to old patterns is happening less and less.

It took years to set these old patterns of noticing what is wrong, so be persistent at reinforcing the new place you want to be.

I like to write my goal each morning as if it has already occurred. You might prefer recording yours, so you can listen to yourself saying it while driving. Either way, find ways to remind yourself to visualize your goal. And then when you notice you are thinking about your current result, remember the mountain road and readjust where you are looking!

Pick one or two things you have been trying to change and make a conscious effort to feed your mind the positive pictures and feelings of having already achieved it.

take steps to achieve your dream

Moving your dream forward starts the moment you wake up

I love the hibernation energy of winter—hot teas, glowing fires, the urge to curl up with a good book and inspiration to move your dreams into action.

Slowing down is part of our natural biological clock at this time of year, and Mother Nature often forces the decision—even if we do not heed the call. Even though cold weather may be blustering outside in the Northern Hemisphere, it does not have to slow your movement towards your dreams. At the same time, pursuing your dreams does not require you to be overactive and miss out on the sweetness of renewing yourself.

One thing that probably keeps you from moving forward on your dream is the mountain of tasks you wake to each day—just to keep your existing life in motion. When I start my day trying to whittle down my to-do list, I rarely get to my main goals, and when I do, my creative juices are slow as molasses.

I have a trick that can keep your sights on the prize—while you enjoy steaming soups and fireside chats. (Even those of you basking in warmth down south can enjoy this trick to prosperity.) My trick?

I always start my day doing something towards my big goal.

Whether you invest 30 minutes or work until noon on your dreams before you start on the to-do’s, you will be amazed at the massive progress you will make.

What if you don’t do this? Well, I will be writing to you next year at this time, and you will be in about the same place as today; your dreams still unrealized.

Go ahead, give it a try. A year of 30 minutes is a whole lot of movement forward. You won’t miss the 30 minutes if you do it; but you will deeply miss your dreams if you don’t.