Category Archives: empowerment

What do you REALLY want?

I often study Napoleon Hill’s work.

He wrote Think and Grow Rich and The 15 Laws of Success. Most of today’s self-help industry is based on Hill’s work in the early 1900’s. Although it looks like it is tied to money as a form of success, Hill really speaks to attaining your desires, whatever they may be.

One aspect of Hill’s work that I love is his revelation that of the 16,000 people he studied the successful ones (only 5% of the total people studied) all were doing what they loved!

How amazing is that?

My work, whether coaching women in business or personal areas, always starts with going deep into the question, “What do you really want?” For years, I could not even begin to answer that question, even about the most mundane things like what restaurant to go to. Why? Because my radar was tuned so strongly to my environment, keeping everyone else happy, and doing what others wanted as my means of getting ahead that I had lost touch with looking inside to find any answers—even those.

You, too, might be struggling to define what you really want. Without having a definite purpose or aim your life probably feels lackluster. Many women go through life like a ship without a rudder because they spent so many years helping others achieve their goals—spouses, children, even bosses.

If you have reached the point where you no longer have children at home, or you want to change your work but don’t quite know how then now is the time to invest in you and find your passion and create a plan to live it.

Carol Hagar and I create women’s retreats throughout the year to help women find their strength and live from it. Our beginning of the year retreats are always amazing because our focus as a culture is always keen on creating plans and making changes at this time of year.

I invite you to join us this year, as we bring together a group of kindred sisters and explore true nature of our inner wishes and find the means of expressing them in our world. We will meet near Austin, Texas, on Saturday, January 31st. If you cannot make it in person, we will have a live training online later in February. However, if you attend live you will get the added benefit of connecting with other women who can hold your intention in their hearts as you move forward into creating 2015 to be your best year thus far.

Betraying Ourselves

You may think the worst thing that has ever happened to you was when your husband left for another woman, or your best friend undermined your vulnerable plans by sharing them with someone behind your back, or … fill in the blank with the time you felt emotionally sucker punched.  Just thinking about it brings back that sick feeling in your solar plexus area, doesn’t it?

In her Huffington post article, Dr. Deborah Caldwell says these betrayals pail in comparison to the ones we do to ourselves, sometimes daily.  I agree with Deborah.  I would not keep someone as a friend if they treated me the way I sometimes treat me.  I certainly would never let someone talk to me the way I sometimes find my inner talk going.

These inner dialogues sabotage our ability to attain any worthy goal. Tell that inner voice goodbye.

How can you expect to release that extra 20 pounds if you keep telling yourself you are fat? Your subconscious mind does the only thing it is programed to do.  It makes sure your outer circumstances verify your inner talk. The same is true for your bank statement.  It will not grow fuller than that which agrees with your inner image.  If you find yourself frequently saying: “I am broke,”  “I cannot afford that” or other similar stories, you will be right.

Rather than keep setting New Year’s resolutions you do not keep or goals you won’t fulfill, why not become increasingly aware of your inner self talk!  First, stop the negative chatter.  Literally when you notice you have started a rant, on you, just say “stop it.”  Then stop. Second, add some affirming voices in place of the worn out record of beating yourself up.  Find the things you do well and keep pointing them out to yourself.  Make a list.  Read it daily and add to it often.

This year, your number one goal could be to become your own best friend.  Everything else, I bet, will fall into place when you start to really like and care for you.